Monday, December 17, 2007

Young Grindle Chp.4 Educational Field Trip

As grindle matured he learned more and more but really his mom felt guilt he hasnt been anywhere for a while and the cave for a while so it was decided that he should have a field trip not the circus and decided to go to the Town history center on homeschool day so one day they went to the history center grindles mom saw her insuarance agent and thought he needed a good yappin at but she had grindle but knowing he had matured yapped anyway well knowing his mistake in years past said mother can we go see history hal she replied OK but ted you are the single worst agent on the planet well they wwent inside and sure enough a creepy looking man in a girl scoutish uniform in a disturbing voice im History sam because History hal was sick history harry ate history hal history harry got a arrested by precinct parry and here i am. well dont sing no matter what
you do said grindles mom well lets start our tur now here is mr.Gabriel he had six fingers grindle smiled he showed many hings most of witch he would never use well after the tour he had to wait in the lobby and after a while he got bored and left he walked around soon grindlesmom came t pick him up and he wasnt there she looked everywhere unil the musem was put on lockdown however it was to late he was walking across the street to starship adult entertainment and went inside he saw nudity sex the f word and his own mothers pictur he took a nap on the fuzzy floor and slept. soon enoughe was in th history center along with his mother who sighed and said never again
Chp.5 R.C.H.H.F.M.P Organization

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Young Grindle Chp.3 Math Tutor

As much as Grindles mother wished she would have said " Well that really dissapoints me and i belive you should trim your mothers nosehairs" little by little she enjoyed it grindle wrote and read ok but when she asked for hime to count to ten he would say Purple g Jhonny Depp 65 1 hola 10 this scared her if he grows up thinking 9 is hola they will ask "who taught you that crap" grindle absent minded as he was would answer my mother thus digging her deeper she tried hard summer bridge said to possibly find a tutor so that if that dosent work he will be to blame and she will not have to move to Bolivia and change her name she put up a job offer on Despraterichpeople.com her description was " Retarted demon needs to learn mathematics reward 500 shillings " well sure enough people called they figure teaching a demons better then 8th graders well it came to be that the first desprate guy Jon alphya was there first when he came he told grindles mom to leave the house and he will teach math in 2 ours well grindle said hi mister are you gonna teach me mathmagic i sure am now i think the best way to learn is by song right when jon started to sing Grindle began to bleed cry shriek he shut up and called grindles mom who was getting a massage and she said "You sung" and he said" yeah " she said " Well go to hell you cruddy barber shop math tutor teach a whale how to be extinct " she rushed home to find 500 shillings gone and grindle unconcious she cried ad dipped him in water he felt better he said mama did you send him to hell she said yes
Chp.4 coming soon

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Top 10 worst toys of 2007

Hi everyone merry xmas young grindle episode 3 is coming soon but after 3 or 4 years ivve made a whole buttload of lists but anyway im going to make you a list with a more comedic touch now if you sat your butt long enough to watch macys youll know we are close to xmas and hannukah so if you watch kiddo tv or cartoons you will see pretty dumb toys well here is a list of the top 10 worst toys

10.Mio Pup
Yeah its so wonderful another crappy electronic girl toy but its like a robo dog and apparentrly if you rub where his touch sensors his eyes will turn into a soccer ball or a star or a Shot bird sign but still its ok but its slogan "the future of freindship " means that friendship must really suck

9. Yu Gi Oh cards
This ones kinda self explanatory nothing says " Birth of jesus " like a demonic card game and new Gladiator booster packs yeah its the most wonderful time of the year


8. V Smile
Ok i think that the real issue with this is that this confuses parents that Metal Gear Solid will teach their children math because after all M is for math

7.Mega Blocks
Ah mega blocks huge cruddy building tools with power rangers and crappy instructions witch you dont understand well at least they ................................................................................................................................ arent a monopoly

6. Nerf Dart tag
just like yu gi oh nothing says birth of jesus like blasting each other with styrofoam darts for points and lets not forget if you wanna be the best you must by The Long shot

5 Any Disney Channel merchandise

Hooray more Miley Cyrus and Zac Efron merchandise to cover up every inch of your home for this id rather have REAL commercials

4.Any Electronic diary
Yeah my sister got one of these last xmas yeah it opened to anyone every night i take her diary and say in a girly tone "Princess" then it plays some showtune and says in a british accent Welcome Back

3.TMX Elmo
Yes the 50th or so anniversary of Tickle me elmo the toy that said the F word but now it has secret tickle spots and says someone give elmo a break ok youve ruined the economy give us a break

2.Webkinz
Last year these were cool and i was close to endorsing it on my blog but after Webkinz Mousepads Clothing bookmarks and trading cards and lets not forget deodarent i quit due to publicity and the eodarant didnt fly with the ladies

1.Baby Alive
The Creepy demonic dolls from the seventies returns with rocket urine green poop and says Mama i made a stinky or Mama its time for me to shoot you with my pee i love you to baby alive go to hell you bug eyed freak!

thank you very much i know you will have to refund but hey what have wally and marty done for you

Sunday, December 09, 2007

Homeschooling Grindle Chp.2 the basics

Grindles mom didnt have very much of a clue how to teach a kid how to read write or even count all she had a clue was all over the television during all the weekends before that faithful expulsion of schools on earth mars or canada so thats were Thon yonder Barney came in he possibly didnt teach a dang thing so it got to the point where all that was left to do was get a summer bridge teaching your "Special" child how to do easy stuff that you just plain do without giving a hell of a thought as the mother watched grindle sing " If all the raindrops were rum drops oh how drunk we would be" while screaming finnaly she turned of the tv and said " My darling its time you learned how to read and write" Grindle said Ok quickly she started reading the best way to teach your child how to read is by reading to the child this stimulates the Readdy part of the brain unfortunatly she did not have a book just Thoust Pepole Magizine she started reading Bob Barketh from if the price is right had ... Oh my lets see Milie Cyrus had sung my goodies have goodies to Zak Efron and the next day was reported to Oh crap well uh why dont you read this page said Grindles mom Grindle read Mr.Magoriums wonder emporium is for ... as grindles mother listned she felt proud that her son was reading and soon enough she bought a book for grindle called The Special Child grindle read then his mom asked him to write a synopsis of the book unfortunatley she had bought it from some guy standing in the middle of nowhere as she read Dis Buk (alot of his words are misspelled) Telz de stori of Cwint Dwen a speshal edid chiyld who thnks the wurld is a eg she was dissapointed no conclusion no beggining no end she knew he had alot of stuff to learn
Tune in next Week for me

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Homeschooling Grindle Chp.1 Day Care

By now your probably wondering why He is home schooled because A. Beowulf’s an idiot and he lies and had sex with Nikki Parker but he was still schooled in 4th Grade B. His Moms Freaking hot or C. He hates loud music. Well yeah 2/3ds of those are true but this is probably why. Grindle attended a Day Care known as Smiley Odeon acres. It was decent and for maybe a week or so Grindle behaved until his mother was talking on her cell phone cussing saying awful swear words. This was due to her car breaking down and her insurance had expired. “Well go to hell you sweaty swine because your mom is as ugly as the nose hairs of some cadaver,” Exclaimed His Mother! Now Grindle heard possibly every word that she had said and that it’s natural to mimic it. The very next day Mrs.Sunbun said awfully gleefully “Okay everyone its no put down day and those really hurt so lets hear some nice words lets start with Grindle” Grindle quickly mimicked “Well go to hell you sweaty swine because your mom is as ugly as the nose hairs of some cadaver”. This automatically created a huge controversy and soon the county was involved the State was involved and soon they decided that he had to be home schooled because they decided the only place where those words could be accepted is at home. Well I guess it’s better than repeating Mrs. Sunbun’s private life tune in next week for chapter 2 The Basics.

Grindle Beowulf and all related characters are not owned by me because the person who wrote the original is dead
But the phrase “Well go to hell you sweaty swine because your mom is as ugly as the nose hairs of some cadaver,” is in all ways nesescary owned buy Monocle Blog Enterprises Copywright 2007 all rights reserved .
P.S say it to your friends and you owe me a nickel

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Who is hannah montana?

There are very many wrongs in this world war poverty combination locks but out of all things on this planet we call earth there is one stupid littlething its called disney channel not all of that rathole channel just non walt disney crap i mean walt was dead even before the disney channels begginig but somewee walts watching high school musical throwing miniature trains at Zac Efron and Miley Cyrus . now honestly nobody watches that crap cause of the plot no its cause zac efron looks like a young ken doll or a girl . but even thogh HSM is a bigger problem problem it has a ok moral like " be yourself" and all that morality crap that you find in Dalai Llamma wise peaceful bubble gum . Hannah Montana has a stupid moral but For those of you who do not have a daughter or a sister or a life here is the plot Hannah montana is a stupid girl named miley with a redneck type of bonjovi dad and a brother who needs to run away in season 3 with stupid freinds named lily who looks hotter than miley and oliver whos the bad seed in a potato patch bt mily is a famous pop star but wants to go to a public school so she keeps it secret. now ocassianly this is funny but when the hannah montana cd came out things got ugly her songs are like an other teen disney star STUPID and PREWRITTEN so if anyone like i dont know Kenny ortega or Billy ray cyrus wants to complain go ahead i need a colledge education

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Cats (what the hell is a jellial cat)

If i were to find something to entertain juvinile toddlers i would of picked Cats and Rigadoon but since rigadoon is almost extinct Cats is my only option and i feel as if that my cat is just stupider first off it has absoluetly no hell of a plot not close
to something like ( A novel) will be made of that musical . its like Ra Ta Ta Hes A Curious cat Gaw lee ya didnt have to pull british english on me. Another absuelotuly terrible detail is your found inside a sewer gators digestive track its like You dont look like cats And you Dont look like people you look like Hooker Werewolves . And My final Question is WHAT THE HELL is a jellical cat i dont understand or is it Jelly Donught Cats or Jolly Good Cats? Fin End of discussion
Andrew Lloyd Webber if you have any possible comments/complaints/Hooker Werewolf musical adds please comment

This is just to say

Thanks for your comment I did just feel like less attention was being paid to the episodes (more on the Imagination Nation thingy) I am STLL suscribed and glad you listened. I do still enjoy Dr.Floyd and i hope season 6 will be better on stories and stuff thanks for listening.

Monday, April 23, 2007

Dr.Floyd IS the COMMERCILIZED PODCAST

I had always honered a few podcasts like storynoryand brainfood and Exdr.floyd now a days dr.f stinks i wouldnt say this if that EXgenius Grant Bacciocco dindnt say "duh i think ill make the imagination nation"this costs 19.99 (4 cents more than floam for a bonus on a Exfree family podcast i mean yeah havee a gift shop on your craphole website but if you advertise on a FAMILY PODCAST . Its more money less fun so Dr.floyd watch out cause Kyle Butler is gonna kick your a dash dash

Friday, April 20, 2007

Happy P.U is that aww crap

Even though bloggers been playing poker with google loggin me out i just wanted to wish everyone happy easter . No more stupid Bunnies or Eastear eggs just uncle sam and his tax paid fireworks .But ijust wanted to tell you what easter eggs really are first little Al Capone bunny hops along when he sees an egg he thinks "money money money money" then he gets his massauring chainsaw and grabs all the eggs on the branch he cuts down then he dips the egg in plastic assorted color than in the easter the easter bunnies evil sweatshop where child labor laws dont apply they take birds into a cell changer changing them into assorted candies then selling them to target for fifty bucks and seling them to you for 5.49 wile your theyre swimming in gold and the rest is terrible the only thing i can say is the 4th day...in july

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Horizons Tribute

Epcot is really losing its theme but this is all we have left

Thursday, January 11, 2007

A Christmas Carol

Hi i know youre probably wondering why 3 weeks after X-Mas are we giving this story well ill tell you that its never to late to hear dickens there ha ha actually no im ripping of dickens so with that said.
A Cristmas overdue Carol
ahh december the lumberjacks at work the drunken santas the red ryder B.B guns WAAAh who threw that "I Did Fool"exclaimed mr.scrooge well someone isnt on the nice list i think hes a ouhh well to start every good dickens rip off the marley 'thats grim'
says a voice from below who are you "Im Rizzo the Rat" oh ok have a blue pellet "ok" Doing well while I barry the deceased muppet uh lets check on scrooge "Humbug" said scrooge "Please we need money for our sons funeral" says Rizzos Parents suddenly from the back of the office Scrooge hees "Dont treat him like that scrooge " says Bob cratchit 'youre right" soon the rat is flung out the window now we will join with our narrotor at the Haunting convention in san frinsisco "UM Hello Evryone i am kybosh "says Kybosh "we have recived word on a man named scrooge so well get him in thes spirit with a haunt now sombody get marly suddenly a member raises his hand "Yes""Um marlys sick" "Fine get casper" Yowie its almost time for the store to close ok im leaving now - Running- whew ugh can i narrorate im late so let me give you asummary of whats happened Bob has gotten permision to get of on Xmas so we gotta go uh more will come after i get a jacket (aprox 20 minutes)

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

the new adventures of Bob supermarket accountant more Google Files and Part two of like boyz thank you all fans of monocle blog oh Soon we will have 150 posts so stick around

Lucky Is Umm Stupid

first off all i absoulutley hate general mills its GENERALLY made by hippys (meanwhile) What is more cherrie then cherrios oh ive got a idea lets make fruity cherrios well call it Rainbow Loops (back at ardens house) See hipppys but i can deal with counter cultralists making my cereal what bothers me is Lucky Charms first off all the marshmallows taste like freeze dried ice cream and the cereal part of it tastes like ezekiel bread but i dont mind cereal rosted over cow crud its ther Lame o leprechaun Lucky the... Stuid Leprechan hes like youll neer get my lucky charms part of a nutritous breakfast why chase a leprecaun just go to Kroger and buy a box do leprecauns make cereal taste better and a another thing that bugs me is 4 words"IS LUCKY A LEPRECAUN" wheres his beard wheres his piipe where the hell is his curly shoes did he sel them on eBay no it only leads to one thing lucky is Strongbad yes strongbad do you ever see him take his mask off yes he hids in in the cheat aka Butch Hartman thats why i hate general mills

Monday, January 08, 2007

Happy New Year

Gee Now all the toys are drunk